To Make You Laugh
by Raine Ito
Summary: As a long awaited wedding draws near, certain hearts are badly broken. With the coming of new realization, friendships and romances are mended and forged, but can they be salvaged in the final twisted battle?
1. The Beginning of The End

(I'm baaaack

The stars were finally out, twinkling merrily in contrast to the melancholy mood in Quistis's heart. She noticed the clock on the wall. It was 12:00 midnight. How long had she been out here, she wondered, staring down in to the courtyard below? Too long. She was definitely starting to feel all the past nights of lost sleep very well. But she couldn't sleep, no matter how she tried. One can't sleep, she thought, in the same bed with jealousy. Sighing, she leaned heavily on the railing, hanging her head over and closing her eyes, trying so hard to avoid the thoughts she'd been unable sleep on for weeks. 

Finally, she gave up, and stood straighter, gathering up the skirts of her nightgown, and quietly pushing open the door, walking down the hall, and entering her own room, hearing the door creak as it slid across the floor. Once there, Quistis sat down on the bed, and watched it begin to drizzle outside her window. The rain picked up speed, going from light to a heavy downpour as she observed it. She walked over, through open the window, and thrust her upper body outside, not caring that her clothes were getting wet, or that the rain was coming inside, into her room. She bowed her head, and let her salty tears meld with the rain. Then she became her usual, practical self again. She couldn't get all bent out of shape, not now, because the wedding was in the morning, and she had to be calm, and being dry wouldn't hurt either.

Quistis closed the window again, and lay down on her bed, letting one last tear trickle down her cheek, before shutting out all thoughts of the "happy" occasion in the morning. Instead, she thought of how truly happy her friends would be, how the whole garden was getting ready busily for the event, and much the two loved each other. They really would do well together, she knew. But somehow, unsurprisingly, it didn't make it hurt any less. Squall and Rinoa had always been meant for each other. But what about her? 

****************

Irvine heard the door across the hall creak slowly open and closed again, as he sat at his desk with the light on. He wondered for a minute if it might be Selphie, but then he realized it didn't matter if it was, he had no excuse to go see, or to knock on her door. It was difficult getting used to not hugging her in the hall, not smiling at her across a room and not having her beam back at him as she crossed to where he was. It was hard as hell, he thought to himself, living without her. But he knew it was better for her. And he knew that she didn't really love him. He wondered if he really loved her. It was hard getting used to being confused, too.

Irvine had always bragged about being a ladies man. "What's your specialty?" "Why, guns and women, of course!" He snorted derisively at himself, knowing that he didn't have a specialty in women any more than in…well, in much of anything else except successfully shooting things. That disturbed him more than Selphie, he realized. What was he doing with his life? He was spending it…on nothing. On being a sniper, true, but…what was that? It was target practice. That was it. His greatest accomplishment was having assisted in shooting a sorceress. None of this meant anything to him. He didn't have a life, he suddenly realized. He didn't have anything. All of it revolved around the gun he found himself holding in his hands.

Shaking his head, he cried out, and threw the gun as hard as he could against the wall. It landed with a crash against a vase in the corner, breaking the prettily painted thing into smithereens. He threw himself down on the bed, biting his lip against the sudden rush of pain in his head. He knew what was missing in his life, and what was keeping him from having one. It was a pretty girl, with a short brunette haircut, and a love for smiling and the color yellow, who was definitely girly, but kicked ass with a nunchaku. It was that girl that had kept him alive for so long. And now, what to do?

He heard a scraping, and sat up quickly, covering his eyes against the sudden glow of light from a candle. Removing his hand, he looked and found Quistis in the doorway, staring at the gun and the shattered vase on the floor in the corner. Quickly coughing to clear his throat, he sat up and looked sheepishly at her. "I'm sorry, instructor, did I wake you?" She shook her head. "I was awake. I heard a crash, and…" she gestured vaguely at the broken vase, and then sighed. He nodded slowly, standing up and walking over to her. Looking at her face, it was clear she hadn't slept for a while. He knew very well she was having trouble, damn, the whole garden knew her feelings for Squall! Everyone but Squall himself, who was oblivious, as usual. Even Rinoa, poor girl, knew.

"And…" she continued, smiling sadly, "I needed an excuse to do something with myself. I suppose I had too much coffee before bed…" Irvine shook his head at her, smiling warmly, and she turned away, composing her features as she felt his hand on her shoulder. "You need to get over him, you know. There are tons of other great guys out there…like me!" He grinned widely, raising his eyebrows ridiculously, and she laughed softly, knowing he was only joking. Irvine sighed. Who was he kidding? Using him as an example of men was a joke in itself. 

But he realized now what Quistis needed, and he took her hand in his, squeezing it gently, letting her know that there was, after all someone there. And the answering pressure surprised him by making him feel a little bit better himself.brbr

****************

As the next morning dawned, Quistis was alarmed when Irvine ran into her room with his collar askew, and his suit twisted. He was fumbling with his tie, and gave Quistis a frantic look. "Quistis, please, this is really embarrassing, but I have no idea how to tie a tie. Help!" Despite herself, Quistis laughed. She straightened his suit and collar, and, like a true instructor, showed him step by step how to tie his tie. Relieved, he thanked her several times, and slammed out of the room. Quistis shook her head in mild amusement, before donning her light blue beribboned maid of honor dress. It was not the kind of thing she usually liked to wear, in fact, all the ruffles and ribbons on it quite bewildered her. But she did it for Rinoa…oh, who was she fooling? She did it for Squall, she did the whole damn thing for Squall. 

Put out of her good mood by these thoughts, she finished fixing her dress, and pulled her hair back into a rather quick and messy version of her usual hairstyle. She stepped out into the hall, and was met by Irvine, who quickly closed his door behind him and winked at her, much more his usual handsome self now. They walked along together, Irvine whistling to himself as Quistis opened the door to the ballroom. Then, suddenly his voice trailed off, and he stopped dead in the doorway.

The room was empty, as they were early, except for two people embracing in a corner. Selphie and Zell, still unaware of their presence stood, accented by the sunlight from the windows as they watched, in shock. Then Irvine turned on his heel and left the room, his face averted from Quistis, who shot one more glance at Selphie and Zell before following him. 

Outside in the hall, Irvine leaned his head against the wall and breathed deeply. There was nothing wrong, he rationalized. Selphie and he were over. She was free to be with Zell. And why not with Zell? Zell was a good guy. A fun guy, just right for Selphie. But dammit, HE had been the one for Selphie! And she'd gone so quickly…it only really hit him now that she was really, truly gone. He'd never have her in his arms again, or brush her hair back and smile down into those playful, trusting eyes…not in that way. He imagined Zell kissing her the way he had, and pounded his fist into the wall in pain.

Quistis found him that way as she approached him in the hall. The pieces were all beginning to fall together before her eyes now, and she felt so guilty at having been selfish enough to wallow in her own self pity, and not see what was happening around her. Poor Irvine, she knew all too well how he felt. She'd known vaguely when he and Selphie had stopped meeting at midnight bythe bench in the courtyard, but it hadn't meant all that much to her then. Now she saw how hard it had Irvine, and put a hand on his shoulder, as a group of SeeDs entered the ballroom for the fast approaching wedding. She didn't have to say anything, he turned swiftly, and walked back in. Shaking her head, she followed.

Selphie and Zell were no longer engaging in any interesting activity, so Quistis was able to notice other things in the room. Everything was candle lit, with a large chandelier hanging from the ceiling, that Quistis knew had never been there before. Squall and Rinoa had entered now, and he really did look marvelous in his tux. She admitted it was a bit odd to see him in a tux, but he looked wonderful in it all the same. And she grudgingly allowed herself the thought that Rinoa looked beautiful to match him in her beautiful white gown, adorned with a few white feathers in her hair, covered by her silky veil. They were the perfect couple, she thought bitterly. The perfect couple, and she couldn't even be the third wheel anymore, not now. Squall wouldn't really want anything to do with her, now that he had whom he wanted. It was too late to be crying over a married man.

As Rinoa walked down the aisle to where Cid and Squall were waiting, she turned and looked at Quistis. Quistis tried so hard to wipe the pain off her face and smile encouragingly at her lucky, lucky friend, who had stolen the man that Quistis loved, the only man she'd ever loved, and-she couldn't, just couldn't smile, so she turned away instead. She was unable to let Rinoa see the hurt and hate on her face, not on her wedding day, which should be the happiest day of her life. She couldn't show this to the world, especially not now. So she would suffer in silence, as she always had. But it would be different now, with no chance left of winning his heart. Because as of today, Squall was no longer himself. He was Rinoa's property, and Quistis knew it well, all too well. 

Irvine looked over at Quistis, and saw her pain through the veil of his own. He just kept watching the happy look on Squall's face as Rinoa grasped his hand and said her vows. It was all too perfect, all too sickeningly wonderful. He plastered a cocky grin on his face as Rinoa looked towards them, then wiped it clean again as she turned away. He looked over at Selphie, and saw her looking up into Zell's grinning face. It disgusted him. Why hadn't he been good enough for her? What had been wrong with him? Wasn't he smart enough, cool enough, handsome enough? He shook his head, knowing. He didn't have a life, that was it. He'd known it last night, he knew it now. He didn't have a life, so why live? 

After the wedding, everyone clustered around Rinoa and Squall, allowing Irvine to slip out unnoticed. He walked slowly back to his room, absently, not really knowing where he was going. Before he knew what was happening, he was sitting on his bed, holding his Exeter gun in his hands. He stared at it for a few moments, contemplating it's silver finishing and the wing shaped segments along the barrel. He ran his hands along it, clutching it to his chest. Well, if this was all he had, then he was going to use it wisely. Slowly, as if in a dream, he closed his eyes and lifted the gun up. He would just place it to his head, and pull the trigger…

"Irvine??" He dropped the gun in surprise, seeing Quistis in the doorway. "Irvine?" He nodded, shaken, and gestured her in, cursing inwardly at his missed opportunity. If only he hadn't hesitated so much, it'd be over now. She sat down beside him as she had the night before, and sighed, smiling sadly at him. "I don't think I can take the party this evening. I mean, you now crowds disturb me," she said, hastily covering up her real reasons. Irvine nodded, like he believed her. "I was going to borrow a car and go out to dinner…would you like to join me?"

Irvine looked at the ground and bit his lip. Quistis looked over at him, and softly said his name. He looked up into her eyes, and realized she was as hurt by today's events as himself. "Please?" she whispered. He nodded, and put on a grin, dramatically bowing to her as he pulled her to her feet. "Let us be off," he said gallantly, and winked at her, leading her out the door, the lonely gun left quite forgotten on the floor.


	2. Thawing the Ice Takes Practice

Sitting alone at a table in the dark was not fun, Selphie decided, burying her head in her hands in the far corner of the ballroom. She almost knocked over her drink, and quickly sat up, having already knocked over a glass of water all over her black sequined dress. At least it was only water, she thought to herself. But she didn't really care about any of this at all. She was just using it, she knew, to take her mind off things. brbr

She looked across the floor, and saw Zell eating a hotdog and holding hands with a pretty blond girl on one side, and a brunette SeeD candidate on the other. She thrust her face into her hands again and bit her lip. Why did he have to be so awful? He just…went off with other girls! It wasn't supposed to be like this, was it? No! It had never been this way with Irvine, not really. He'd joked around a bit, but he'd only truly had eyes for Selphie. But oh no, not Zell. He'd already probably danced with every girl here, EXCEPT Selphie.brbr

She stood up, and locked eyes with him as he munched on his hotdog. He looked around, and grinned stupidly. Disgusted, she walked to the other end of the room, so she didn't have to see him. Only this morning it had seemed perfect. All too perfect, she should have known. Somehow, she knew she shouldn't be surprised by Zell's sudden change, yet she was. Surprised and saddened. Would she ever find someone who actually cared enough about her to bother? Irvine had been too set on the rest of his life to spend enough time with her. And now Zell…brbr

Unable to bear it anymore, she stormed out of the ballroom and started running down the hall, in no particular direction. A few passing people gave her startled looks, but she didn't care. All that mattered was getting away, to where she could just be by herself. She ran until she found somewhere to run to, and found herself in the training center, unexpectedly. She stopped for only a minute, then ran forward into the training center, and threw herself at the first monster she saw. It was a grat, and she had it down in about three blows. Slightly pleased with herself, she whirled, and tackled another one.brbr

She didn't know how long she went on like that, but with each fallen monster, she felt more and more satisfied. After a while, she sat down on the grass, and breathed heavily. So what if Zell didn't care? So what? It didn't matter. Nothing mattered. She had herself, and her skills, and her friends. She didn't need a guy. Ever. Never again. This was it, she thought. This was IT. brbr

She didn't notice the approach behind her until a huge shadow loomed over and in front of her. Whirling around, she saw the T-Rexaur, raising it's head and roaring 10 or more feet above her. Scrambling to her feet, she grabbed her Strange Vision and stood at the ready, ducking as it swiped over her head. She lashed out twice with her nunchaku, then dropped and rolled out of the way of it's massive foot. Cracking out her weapon with fervor, she almost managed to avoid the jaws…but not quite. Before she knew what was happening, she was lifted up into the massive maw of the big ugly beast.brbr

She struggled violently, dropping her weapon in a panic and trying to wedge her removed boot between it's teeth so that she could slip free. Unsuccessful, she closed her eyes and prepared for the end. So this is it, she thought. At least I won't have to see Zell anymore. I wonder if he'll miss me…brbr

Suddenly, she was dropped out of the mouth, and landed in a heap on her feet. The T-Rexaur was screaming with rage, and she ducked, but realized that it's attentions were not directed at her, but at another figure blocking it away from her. She looked up, and saw a familiar blond form in a long gray coat. Seifer?? What was he doing helping her? He'd only returned to the garden a month or so ago, and no one was really comfortable around him. She wasn't sure who was more dangerous, him or the monster. Quietly, she got up, and snuck behind a tree to watch.brbr

Seifer had the creature down in a few powerful magic blows, before turning back around, and heading for the exit. Selphie looked toward the fallen monster, then toward him, before running out of her cover and catching up with him. "Thanks!" She said, smiling and grabbing his arm. He shook her off and kept going. "Heeey!" She jumped in front of him. "Don't leave so soon! I want to thank you! You saved me!"brbr

Seifer deigned to give her a long look. "You just did," he muttered. "But…" He rolled his eyes. "What??" "Just…thanks, I guess," she said. "But why did you do it? I thought you hated us! Squall and everybody!" He just turned and kept walking. He couldn't help wondering to himself why he'd saved her himself, really. It had seemed so natural. I'm going soft, he thought, heading back to the ballroom. He heard Selphie hard on his heels and groaned, but continued to ignore her as he walked. She stayed behind him, not really trying to talk to him, so it suited him just fine.


End file.
